This time last year.. January 24, 2008

At this time last year, i was in my flat studying for end of semester exams.. i had my study desk with me, i had my books with me and i had some sort of motivation to actually read them. Now, i do want to succeed in this life, i do want to get my credentials at the end of it all and i do want to make loads of money..we all do..but at this ver time last year..this yearning to succeed was stronger 100 fold.

At this time last year, i wasn’t an aunty yet (again) and my 20 year old cousin was not a mummy..infact at this time last year, she was happily learning the romantic french language at the Ecole de Langues and touring Europe with her rich French Family who were hosting her.

At this time last year, the word relationship and commitment meant something totally different.My hobbies were well exploited,infact i had a fabulous opportunity to assist one of my menteurs in the hobby section set up his collection in a gallery in Florence, Italy. Wow, at this time last year, i had vision, saw my dreams begin to unfold, i saw opportunity knock not once but quite a number of times. At this time last year, i was thinking of starting this blog as well.

At this time last year, I weighed at least 8 kgs heavier, wore clothes two sizes up and couldn’t be bothered to wear mascara or whatever.At this time last year, My country was at peace and my Gouvernment at ease..my tribesmen and others’ tribes worked together and schooled together. At this time last year, my Church was a Holy place, a refuge and the safest place in the land.

At this time, in this year..nothing is the same..my study desk i do not have, it is property to another lucky soul..my books i have though the motivation is no more..my hobbies are still hobbies though the opportunity stopped knocking.. i am not jumping into planes and trains to set up exhibitions and i am not uuuuu–aaahhing at my progress..i am not passionately swaying to the rythm of Salsa every Wednesday and Sunday without fail and i am not spending my Saturday afternoons at the pool 5 minutes from my flat and my evenings with friends at the Theater listening to ‘L’Ochestre Nationale de Lille’.
I still yearn to make loads of money though my ideas aren’t the same as yester-year’s, infact they are quite the opposite from what i once held onto.

At this time,in this year, the words relationship and commitment actually do have meaning in my life, infact at this time, in this year, my commitment to Mr. Man actually makes me happy.I have new friends that i had not last year..i even have clothes that i had not last year seeing how i lost the 8 kgs and dress in two sizes smaller.

This time this year, i have the same smile if not brighter, the same love for my family nomatter what, the same love for my friends both those i left behind and the ones i met and bonded with.I have this time, this year a stronger determination to succeed in school even when the desk lacks, the books are scarce and the motivation quite low..yes, determination and motivation work hand in hand BUT..where one lacks and the other prevails, there’s bound to be some sort of uplift of the other (if that makes sense)…

This time this year, 20 year old cousin is the proud mother of 6month old Zara, and is touring not europe but crossed the seas and is happily watching over my lil’ princess.Am still trying to locate a desent salsa club and though my other passion has to take a long break, am positive soon i’ll have what i need and a whole of opportunity again to make it flourish.

This time this year, my country is not at peace, my church and those of others is not the refuge it once was.My Gouvernment is not offering the Nation healing and my countrymen have no more love for each other.

God remains the same and so does His love..My Faith remains the same.

This was just me viewing things from outside the box lol whatever that means..i am not sure if what i am this time this year is what i’ll be this time next year..we all grow physically lol ..i might be 15 kgs heavier (God forbid)..but hey, am sure this time next year, i’ll have grown yet again in mind, spirit, love, and in strength.

Well at least one thing’s for sure, this time this year, just like this time last year, i always strive to be better than i was yesterday..to love deeper than i did yesterday..to think bigger than i did yesterday, to laugh harder and to worry less.

Lessons Learnt ’07 December 18, 2007

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.

I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I’ve learned that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I’ve learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.

I’ve learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I’ve learned that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I’ve learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I’ve learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I’ve learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I’ve learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I’ve learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I’ve learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I’ve learned that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I’ve learned that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

I’ve learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I’ve learned that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I’ve learned that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.

I’ve learned that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I’ve learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you.

I’ve learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I’ve learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I’ve learned that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I’ve learned that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings and standing up for what you believe.

*************

AOB

Wishing you all a Merry Christmas full of love and laughs and good food and presents lol . .but as we all get into the festiveness of the season, let us not forget Baby Jesus who’s the reason we’re making merry. Let us have in mind those who have no family or opportunity to enjoy Christmas like we will.

I wish those in Kenya very peaceful elections, i’ll pray for no blodshed, no hatred .I’ll pray for acceptance and Love, peace and understanding.I’ll pray for the leader whom God has appointed and annointed.